Funny SMS Friends ;-)

1. I am a killer, I kill people for money. But because you are my friend, I'll kill you for nothing!
2. We will now upgrade your brain, please wait............ Searching............ Searching......... still searching.............. sorry NO BRAIN found ! ! !
3. U got style, u got sex-appeal, u got the intelligence and u sure got the body. Wait. Sorry, wrong number!
4. Friends are just like stars. You don't always see them, but you now they are there for you. Your friend
5. A ring is round and has no end, that's how long I'll be your friend!!!
6. The morning is just a few moments away. Go to sleep and when you wake up, remember me as a friend who is allways there for you and never let you down
7. Hello too the owner of the cell-phone with no.+316........Your sim-card is been cracked open by Hacker's,and will destroy your phone within 24 hours,from NOW!
8. Yes, God made you first, but there is always a rough draft before the final copy.
9. The NHS regrets to inform you that your birth was an accident. Please report to your nearest hospital to be put down. We apologise for any inconvenience.
10. This sms can only be readed by someone SEXY:...try again...again...maybe you are just not sexy?...one more time...hey don't force it ugly!!!
11. Secrets, they only last long enough to break you down.
12. Life isn't easy it will never be .... Remember you got friends one of them is me
13. Wherever you go, whatever you do, may god's angels watch over you.
14. Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver the other gold.
15. When darkness moves in on me, it is the love of people like you that allows me to go through defeat and still know to be fully accepted.
16. Don't feel sad, don't feel blue, Frankenstein was ugly too!
17. I must have been born under a lucky star , to find a friend as nice as you are. I will follow the rainbow to the end , if you promise to remain my friend !!!
18. Roses are red violines are bleu, a face like yours belongs to the zoo.
19. Roses are red, violets are blue, Frankenstein is ugly, but what the hell happend to you?
20. Braindetector activated, calibrating, now searching.........still searching......get a good grip of your gsm....still searching.......no brain found.
21. Umm...your .... ZIP is open...
22. I'm not as dumb as you look.
23. If I can be of any help, you're in worse trouble than I thought.
24. What do I miss about my wife? Her absence.
25. This cat, is cat, a cat, good cat, way cat, to cat, keep cat, a cat, idiot cat, busy cat, for cat, 20 cat, seconds cat! Now read it all without the word cat!
26. Hi, I am an alien and I'm checking for some chicks in your phonebook..Searching..Searching..Searching..Sorry,no chicks found! Gay?
Conclusion: You Are Gay!
27. If you are in trouble, If you need a hand, Just call my number, because I'm your friend!
28. There is: Hot-Sex, Fast-Sex, Cuddle-Sex, Safe-Sex, Group-Sex, SM-Sex, Telephone-Sex, Cyber-Sex, and for people like you: NO SEX.
29. A-Ur Attractive B-Ur Beautiful C-Ur Charming D-Ur Delicious E-Ur Exciting F-Ur Funny G-Ur Gorgeous H-Ur Heavenly I-Im J-Just K-Kidding L-Loser
30. Who Wants 2 B A £MILLIONAIRE£ Let's play? Q.Nobody likes u cos u r a: A.Cunt B.Wanka C.Rsole D.Twat 50/50 Phone a friend? RING ME! I'LL TELL U!
31. Psst! Cutie... ..yes YOU! Ur smiling again Its coz i told u dat ur CUTE hey...... Sometimes we need 2 lie Just to make some one SMILE!
32. .....Friends r like stars....you do not ALWAYS SEE them but you know they r always there. "Just like you"
33. Close ur eyes and make a wish Angelz will b there to blow u a kiss They'll guide u and make all ur dreams come true Just like they did for me wen I asked for a frend like u
34. Remember when you need a fuck, I will always be here 4U, because FUCKstands for "Friendship U Can Keep".So promise me we will FUCK forever *_*
35. An American psychology survey recent;y stated that if you are sexually inexperienced and not food in bed, you will be holding this phone with your right hand
36. Friendship is like peeing in your pants... Everyone can see it but only you can see the true warmth of it! Thank you for being the pee in my pants!
37. Im at the Police Station. Police caught me & filed a case against me. "POSSESSION OF GOOD LOOKS" I'm doomed! NEED SOMEONE UGLY 2 BAIL ME OUT; So HURRY UP!